2010: Begin Again - The End is Here; SMART Goals/Resolutions

And now, the end is here

And so I face the final curtain.

Regrets, I’ve had a few

But then again, too few to mention.

Yes, there were times, I’m sure you knew

When I bit off more than I could chew.

There you have the first two lines from the first three verses of My Way. Don’t worry. I’m not expiring, but the final curtain is falling on the year 2010. It’s a year I began with the theme, 2010: Begin Again. The idea was to forget about resolutions and go for revolutions instead. Take charge and make changes in my life. Looking back, I see successes and learning opportunities along the way.

It’s Dec. 29. I’m off work. The wind is blowing and it’s snowing. Before I go out to tackle the runway I call a driveway, I thought I’d share some thoughts as I bring the theme to a close.

You should know this will be a bit different from past entries, Every once in awhile, a song title will appear. I’m sipping iced tea and listening to CDs I made a few years ago for my 25^th anniversary with Lynda. I thought I’d let you know what I’m listening to as we go along here. These were all songs that were popular when we got married way back in 1981.

I started the current CD while emptying the dishwasher and getting a few things cleaned up. So far you’ve missed:

• You Make My Dreams Come True – Hall and Oats
• Imagine – John Lennon
• Young Turks – Rod Stewart
• Don’t Stand So Close to Me – The Police
• Waiting on a Friend – The Rolling Stones
• Our Lips are Sealed – The GoGos
• Every Little Thing She Does is Magic – The Police
• Elvira – The Oak Ridge Boys (Had to include it as it was popular, even if not with me.)
• I am a Woman in Love – Barbara Striesand
• How ‘Bout Us – Champagne
• I Love You – Climax Blues Band

And now, back to the blog.

When I began 2010, I had some definite ideas in mind as to what I wanted to see happen during the year. Some areas definitely saw more progress than others. At the top of the list, I’d have to put my spiritual walk. Throughout 2010 my path continued to develop, bringing me to the point I am at now.

My spiritual path has followed many twists and turns through my life. As a teenager, I declared myself to be an atheist. In my 20s I began questioning that belief. I became a member of an evangelical Christian church in Red Deer. From there I ended up attending a Pentecostal church in Sylvan Lake. When I moved back to Red Deer, I became a member of a very fundamentalist church. It’s still there and still quite large.

It’s My Turn – Diana Ross

I started questioning again as the beliefs of the church truly flew in the face of what I knew about science and the history of this amazing home we call earth. I drifted to an evangelic church, then on to a liberal church – the United Church of Canada. I was much more at home here. They even referred to God as She on occasion! Still, I questioned. Soon I was attending the Centre for Positive Living in Red Deer, a spiritual centre based on New Thought teachings . . . not to be confused with New Age.

I remained with the centre until I moved to Lethbridge. There isn’t a church with that focus, so I stopped attending anywhere and started exploring and questioning on my own. While I followed the teachings of Unity Church for a few years, I struggled with some principles expressed on an online radio show hosted by some leaders.

My Endless Love – Diana Ross and Lionel Richie (Ick!)

And, finally, the circle is complete. I’m back to where I started, and happily so. Well, not exactly where I started. I am no longer a teen and I see myself as a secular humanist. I do not believe in a god-creator of the universe.

Instead, I’m overwhelmed by the magnificence of the universe and our own little slice of it. The need to protect it, care for it and to love and care for our fellow human beings is my faith base. John Lennon really addressed it with the song Imagine,

Crying – Don McLean

I have found a spiritual home with the Unitarian Universalist Fellowship of Lethbridge. With UUF I find open minds and people willing to accept each other as they are. No need to convert or to find salvation from a non-existent original sin. Here people can follow their own path and celebrate with each other where we intersect.

So, spiritually, I’m saying it was a fantastic year and I’m looking forward to more growth in the years to come.

Health was also a concern coming into 2010, both physically and mentally. I’m going to claim 50% success here. Mentally, I’m quite content. I’ve been reading some excellent books and reduced the stresses in life considerably.

Sweetheart – Franke and The Knockouts

Physically, I did not achieve what I set out to do . . . drop some significant pounds. However, with other things now well on track, I can focus on this goal in 2011. I’m going to be approaching it logically and sensibly by focusing on eating habits and getting some exercise. No pills or potions. So, we’ll see how that goes in the coming year.

Financially, there were also some objectives to tackle. I’m really interested in home-based businesses and looking to create additional income streams. 2010 saw a lot of research. In the past, I’ve too often jumped into something without really thinking about it. That’s when I’d find it wasn’t really a fit for me.

The Breakup Song – Greg Kihn Band (Love this song!)

This past year, I looked into several potential avenues. I found something I really like with training by someone I greatly admire. This is Send Out Cards and I’m working with a dynamic woman named Jackie Ulmer. It’s all about connecting with people and that’s something I’m trying to achieve in life. And Jackie doesn’t teach high-pressure sale tactics, which fits well with my approach to life.

Just the Two of Us – Grover Washington Jr. and Bill Withers (Another great song.)

So I’m not rushing it to become an ‘overnight’ success. I’m approaching it as an extension of my lifestyle. I’ve also decided to add an additional stream having discovered a Canadian company called OnlyGreen. Its focus is on environmentally friendly products that are safe for people to use in their homes and for personal care. Again, it fits with lifestyle and belief in the need for each of us to do what we can to protect the planet and our health. To get a quick idea of what I mean, go check the labels on some of the personal care items in your home. How many of the ingredients can you pronounce? Do you know what they really are? Can you say sodium laureth sulfate? More to come on that!

Finally, Lynda and I met with a representative for Manulife One. Maybe you’ve seen their commercials showing the party/reception with Mr. And Mrs. 46,000 talking to Miss 27,000 and so on.

Woman – John Lennon

My investment advisor suggested we check it out. No advantage to her, just sharing a good thing. Well, we were impressed by Manulife’s approach and mad the switch. It’s starting us off the new year on a sound footing that we haven’t had for a number of years. Thanks, Jason, for coming to our place to explain it all!

Urgent – Foreigner

So, what’s in store for 2011?

I’m going to declare the revolution is over and I’m going back to resolutions, but with a difference.

So many people make resolutions and so many people fail to keep them. Why is that? I think it might be because a resolution is not a real goal. Too often it’s more like a thoughtful wish. I know I should shed some weight, so that’s my resolution for 2011. Nice thought, but there needs to be a plan to back it up!

Make your resolutions goals with a plan and success rates will go up. This is something I’ve known for a long time, but failed to act upon. This year I vow to make my resolutions SMART goals.

Kiss On My List – Hall and Oates

I’m assuming that by now everyone knows about SMART goals. However, I also know that when you ‘assume’ you make an ‘ass’ of ‘u’ and ‘me.’ So here’s a quick review of SMART goals. If you’re still reading (and I really don’t know if anyone reads these blogs or not) I encourage you to apply this methodology to your resolutions.

S – Specific

M – Measurable

A – Achievable

R – Relevant

T – Timely

Specific: What exactly will you accomplish?  “I want to lose weight.” “I want to get my debt under control.” “I want to find a new career.” All very nice resolutions, but there isn’t anything specific about them.

Starting Over – John Lennon

Let’s look at weight loss. Yes, I want to lose weight, but that’s very general. Far better to note that I want to lose 30 pounds or whatever your actual goal may be. Then you know exactly what you will accomplish.

Measurable: How will you know when you’ve reached this goal? In this case, it’s easy! I’ll be 30 pounds lighter. Even better, with a specific goal, I can measure progress along the way to achieving the desired end result. Your resolution/goal, must be measurable.

Lady – Lionel Richie and The Commodores

Achievable: Is achieving this goal realistic with effort and commitment? Do you have the resources to achieve this goal? If not, how will you get them? I believe that losing 30 pounds is definitely achievable. Others have done it. So can I with the right effort and commitment. What resources will I need? Knowledge about effective methods, diet and exercise will be needed. I have several books and websites marked that can provide the knowledge. If I need more, I’ll do some more research.

Relevant: Why is the goal significant in your life? There needs to be a real reason as to why you want to achieve a goal. It needs to be relevant.

Boy From New York City – Manhatten Transfer

Weight loss is important on a number of levels. Emotionally, a person can feel better if they reach a goal that enhances the physical appearance and well-being. Health is adversely affected by being overweight. Being healthy as years go by can be very relevant and maintaining a proper weight can help achieve that.

Timely: When will this goal be achieved? Here you get to choose how aggressively you will pursue a goal.

Chariots of Fire – Vangelis

Remember it also needs to be achievable. If losing 30 pounds is the goal, saying you want to do it this week is unrealistic and you are doomed to fail – unless you cut off a leg or something! So break the resolution or goal down. Let’s say you want to be 30 pounds lighter by the end of June 2011. That’s six months away. Then you can break the 30 pounds down to five pounds a month. Is that achievable? I should think so.

I would suggest not setting the time so far out that you don’t need to put effort into achieving it.

Physical – Olivia Newton John

For example, saying you’ll take two years to lose 30 pounds may not be a big enough stretch to motivate action. If you were looking at losing 100 pounds, then maybe two years is a good time frame.

SMART goals are a total package. Each facet must work with the others. If all are in line and a real desire for you, they can be achieved and help you keep the resolutions you make for the year.

Spirits in the Material World – The Police

With that my 2010: Begin Again theme draws to a conclusion. But you can continue to follow this blog through 2011. I have some ideas in mind to share as I continue along in the exciting journey of life. Ideas on being ‘green,’ personal growth, what’s positive in this sometimes crazy world of ours, and just some random thoughts.

Happy New Year, everyone! Coincidentally and appropriately, the following song just started.

Another One Bites the Dust - Queen

2010: Begin Again - The reason for the season

This week I received a Christmas message in my email. I appreciate receiving seasonal greetings and I do really love this time of year. However, this particular message hit a raw nerve. 

The problem was the tone and the topic. It was basically one of those "Jesus is the reason for the season" messages. Some years ago, I must confess I believed the same thing. Since then, I have come to know the truth and the truth has set me free. Yes, I am no longer a Christian. Now I am a happy heathen! 

That being said, I still like to respect the rights of others to worship and have faith as they see fit. Unfortunately, there is a certain element in the Christian church that does not share this approach. And that brings me to the message I received.

It contained multiple photos of some very lovely Christmas trees. Before each image the message proclaimed:

This is a Christmas Tree
 
Scrolling down through the message, this was repeated numerous times. After the last photo came the following message:

These are NOT  Holiday Trees

They are NOT Winter Festival trees

They are NOT Hanukkah bushes


They are NOT Allah plants

They are Christmas trees.
Say it...
Christmas , Christmas , CHRISTmas

Yes CHRISTmas -not Holiday

We are not celebrating the birth of a Holiday !!!


We are Celebrating the Birth of
Jesus Christ!!!
So I would like to say to each and everyone of you
Have a Very Merry CHRISTMAS
and may GOD BLESS each and every one of you!!!

Take a stand and pass this on !!

I was grateful for the last statement - take a stand - as after reading the message I really felt like it was time to do just that. And so I did. Below is my response. 


WARNING: If your faith is easily offended you may wish to stop reading now. While I am no longer a Christian, I do have respect for those of the faith who are open minded and intelligent enough to realize that their perspective on spirituality is but one view. What irritates me are those individuals of any faith who believe their path is the ONLY path and who have so little understanding of other beliefs that they don't even realize some of the things they practice have origins outside of their church. And now, the message:

Enough is enough with this fundamentalist Christian propaganda. It’s time Christians faced the truth. It IS a holiday season. It was so long before the invention of Christianity. In fact, many of the ‘Christian’ celebrations at this time of the year were stolen from more ancient beliefs.

 

Shall we get down to the truth?

 

First, the Christmas tree, as that is the focus of this little misguided diatribe. The “Christmas” tree actually evolved from a pagan symbol used by cultures that predate Christianity. The Druids in ancient England & Gaul and the Romans in Europe both used evergreen branches to decorate their homes and public buildings to celebrate the Winter Solstice. Over the years, these traditions were adopted by Christians, who incorporated them as part of their Christmas holiday celebration.

 

So, we should actually call it a Solstice tree.

 

Furthermore, Christmas as a celebration of the birth of Jesus, is really just the result of the early Christian church attempting to convert non-believers by usurping festivities that existed long before the supposed arrival of a savior. There were a bunch of festivities (holidays) already taking place at that time of year. Rather than fight them, the church decided to declare that this is when Jesus was born so the festivities would take on a Christian veneer. In effect, the early church tried to steal the traditions of others. 

Show me where the Bible gives the birth date of Jesus and declares "And on the 25th day of the 12th month, thou shalt honour the birth of thy saviour." Early Christians did not celebrate Christmas, they honoured Easter. 

So, who first celebrated this time of the year? Many people. All predating Christianity.

• In Scandinavia, the Norse celebrated Yule from December 21, the winter solstice, through January. In recognition of the return of the sun, fathers and sons would bring home large logs, which they would set on fire. The people would feast until the log burned out, which could take as many as 12 days. The Norse believed that each spark from the fire represented a new pig or calf that would be born during the coming year. So “Yuletide carols being sung by a choir” really has nothing to do with Christmas. Yule is an old Norse tradition. And they didn’t worship Jesus. They looked to Odin and a host of other gods.

• Germans were terrified of Odin, as they believed he made nocturnal flights through the sky to observe his people, and then decide who would prosper or perish. Because of his presence, many people chose to stay inside. Hmmm. A magical being who travels through the sky watching people to see who has been bad or good, so you better be good for goodness sake! Sound familiar?

• In Rome, Saturnalia—a holiday in honour of Saturn, the god of agriculture—was celebrated. Beginning in the week leading up to the winter solstice and continuing for a full month, Saturnalia was a hedonistic time, when food and drink were plentiful and the normal Roman social order was turned upside down. For a month, slaves would become masters. Peasants were in command of the city. Business and schools were closed so that everyone could join in the fun.

• Members of Rome’s upper classes often celebrated the birthday of Mithra, the god of the unconquerable sun, on December 25. It was believed that Mithra was born in cave to a virgin. He was considered one part of a divine trinity. For some Romans, Mithra’s birthday was the most sacred day of the year. Does any of this sound familiar?

• In the early years of Christianity, Easter was the main holiday; the birth of Jesus was not even celebrated.

• Giving gifts at Christmas also has nothing to do with “Three Wise Men” or gifts for the Baby Jesus. The tradition, again, began in northern Europe and ancient Rome where people gave each other small presents as part of the year-end festivities.

• Wreaths, so popular at Christmas, have their beginnings among the folk practices of the pre-Christian Germanic people. During the cold December darkness of Easter Europe, they would gather wreaths of evergreen and lighted fires as signs of hope in a coming spring and renewed light.

• Mistletoe . . . so festive, so much a part of Christmas. Right. Mistletoe was held sacred by the Norse, the Celtic Druids and the North America’s First Nations peoples. Druid priests employed it in their sacrifice to the gods while Celtic people believed it possessed miraculous healing powers. It was the sacred plant of Frigga, the Norse goddess of love.

• Holly, the sacred plant of the god Saturn, was used at the Roman Saturnalia festival to honour him. Druids believed that holly stayed green to keep the earth beautiful when the sacred oak lost its leaves.

Enough, already, of the “Jesus is the reason for the season” mentality. Get over it people! It’s a festive holiday season that originated out of older traditions more in touch with the Earth. And if you are really one of those who believes the Bible is the literal word of God, I share this written by one of your own: Jesus is Lord.

You want to say ‘Merry Christmas?’ Fine. I do, too.

If someone else wants to say Happy Yule, that’s cool. 

If I want it to be a Solstice Tree, let me! 

Just don’t steal another culture’s traditions then try to denigrate their beliefs by claiming it’s a ‘CHRIST-mas’ tree and everyone else should bow down to a skewed Christian perspective of reality.

 

Heathen’s Greetings, one and all!

2010: Begin Again - Random Observations from a Busy Week

Giving you the finger . . . advice

My philosophy occasionally embraces the odd and unusual outlook on life. With that in mind, the following statement should not strike you as being bizarre.

You should look after your fingers when you are young.

Well, you should look after your fingers whatever age you may be, but particularly when you are young. No, I’m not talking about manicures and nail polish! Although a nice manicure is good at any time. I mean take care to prevent damage to your fingers.

Take me for example. I’ve got 10 fingers, just like most people. When I was in my teens and early 20s, I had one damaged when my dog accidentally bit through it. I broke another playing softball. I smashed another when I dropped an irrigation pipe on it while helping my uncle move the system. And I put a drill bit through another while working on my boogie van. Something you may recall if you heard my most recent speech at Toastmasters.

The damage to those fingers started coming back to haunt me early in adulthood. Now I’m 53 and I’m still paying the price for youthful indiscretions. When the temperature plummets to –20C (-4F) and I have to be outside shoveling snow – yet again – the tips of the most severely damaged fingers really feel the cold. By that I mean they practically freeze and become painful while the other fingers are still functioning. I’m assuming blood circulation problems to the extreme ends are to blame. And those problems originated through one of the scenarios outlined above.

So if you ever see me seeming to flip you the bird, chill out! It’s just a frozen fingercicle and not an insult.

Of buffets and bellies

On Saturday my mother-in-law, likely the most wonderful mother-in-law in the world, treated Lynda and I to lunch at a local Chinese restaurant that offers a pretty tasty buffet.

Mixing Chinese food with an ‘all-you-can-eat’ serving concept isn’t always a good thing for me. In fact, I will often fall victim to the ‘eyes-are-bigger-than-the-belly’ phenomenon. Too much food gets loaded on the plate because the visual senses are over-stimulated and chowing it all down becomes a major undertaking.

While taking a breather, I looked around the restaurant. Holy side of beef! Most of the people there were huge! And I don’t mean they were tall.

There were at least four guys there in their late 30s and up with ginormous bellies that sagged down over their belts. Each looked like he’d tip the scales at close to 300 lbs. Each had more food piled up on a single plate than the average person could squeeze onto a serving platter. The guys weren’t alone, but I won’t talk about the women for fear of being branded a sexist!

I don’t mention this to mock or ridicule anyone. For me, it was a moment of self-reflection.

I struggle with food. No, let me take that back. It’s not a struggle at all! I eat more than I should without any problem at all. I imagine there are all sorts of psychological reasons for that. There is an emptiness I am trying to fill. It’s how I deal with stress. That sort of thing.

Of course, it could simply be that I love the stimulation of my sense of taste!

However I wish to rationalize it, the truth is I need to drop about 20lbs. Seeing the outcome of uncontrolled or extremely poor eating habits demonstrated by the bellies at the buffet was like being slapped in the face with a pound of lard.

I can avoid the belt-buckle avalanche by committing to awareness dining. Watch what I take in and stop when full. Don’t let those demanding little taste buds push me around!

West Lethbridge going to the dogs

Our dog Max is about 10 years old now. We got him when he was about 18 months old. We were his third family and while it looked shaky at first, we became is permanent family.

One spring day about 10 months or so after we acquired Max, I had him out at the off-leash area in West Lethbridge’s Popson Park. This area is home to a few prairie rattlesnakes and despite the warning signs I’ve never been fortunate enough to see one there. Owners are warned to watch for them as they can pose a danger to pets.

There should have a been a warning about porcupines! That morning, while running along the river bank, Max was a ways ahead of me when he stopped and suddenly stuck his face into some bushes. He yelped and jumped back with a face full of quills. I rushed him back to the car and quickly drove home.

It was a Sunday. We were also very short of cash. And we didn’t have a regular vet at that point. We called three or four different vet clinics and explained the situation. When we noted that finances were a challenge, our calls for help were quickly shut down. It was beginning to look like someone would have to sit on Max and I’d need to use pliers to rip the quills from his face. Not a pleasant idea.

Then we made one last call. The vet understood. He took Max in, sedated him, removed all of quills and only charged us the costs without a profit for him, or for the fact that is was a Sunday emergency.

He has been our vet every since. When our cat, Digit, had to be put down, the clinic later sent us a card with his paw print and a tuft of his hair. Everyone there signed the card. Our relationship was sealed.

On Saturday I accidentally attended the grand opening of Park Pet Hospital at their new location in West Lethbridge, only a few blocks from where we live! I’d stopped by to make an appointment to have our cat, Maya, spayed. Much to my surprise there were treats and tours as Dr. Patrick Galloway and his staff were celebrating their grand opening.

I hope you pet owners appreciate your vet as much as we do ours. If you don’t have a pet vet yet, I highly recommend you check out Park Pet Hospital. It’s a great bunch of people who really care about your animals friends.

Congratulations to doctors Galloway, Schluchter, Kremeniuk and McLean and all of the staff at Park Pet Hospital. Thanks for relocating to our neighbourhood.

RIP Ripley

Those of you who are Facebook Friends may have seen my photos there of three mice I acquired as pets more than a year ago. Sadly, I had to put of the sisters down early in the past week. Ripley, the brown mouse, lived in the same enclosure as her two sisters. They shared the same home, the same food and same access the wheel and climbing toys. But Ripley gained weight that Thelma and Louise have avoided. She really was a roly-poly little fur ball in the end. I found one morning lying in middle of the cage not moving. I actually thought she was dead. However, when I lifted her up, she shifted in my hand. Not quite dead, but obviously suffering, so I couldn't leave her like that. I humanely ended her suffering. So, RIP Ripley. 

Photos: 1) Me shoveling snow last winter. This winter looks like it'll be the same! 2) Max posing at Nicolas Sheran Park this past spring. 3) Maya sleeping on the arm of the couch during the summer. 4) Ripley on my arm, Thelma and Louise in my hands shortly after they arrived a year ago.

Reach out and touch someone

SEND A GREETING CARD FOR FREE!

If you are like me, and probably like many other people, too, you are paying close attention to how you spend your money these days. Sure, sure . . . we should do this all of the time, but recently there seems to be a stronger focus on the need.

When I saw an article from Investopedia entitled “6 Outrageously Overpriced Products” I had to check it out. I wanted to see where I may be wasting money and if there was an alternative.

There wasn’t anything too shocking or surprising. Movie theatre popcorn? Yeah, we all know that’s really where the money is in the movie biz! Ah, but that heavenly fragrance. How can I say no to the promises made by the scent of freshly popped corn? I can’t. So the theatre gets my money.

I have to agree with some of the other examples. Bottled water and designer labels are often way overpriced. But I definitely disagree with the second item on the list.

Greeting cards.

How do you put a price on what it means to someone to receive a card from a friend or family member? Sure there is the option to create homemade cards. Some folks do and they’re beautiful. You should see the creations my daughter makes for me. I love each of them. But what if there are more reasons for cards than you have time to create?

Ah, now I see where the over-priced thing comes into effect. I know all about that. Greeting cards from card shops do start to cost a pretty penny. It can make you hesitate. Add to that the fact that sometimes things creep up on you and anniversaries or birthdays explode onto the scene before you even get a chance to find a card, let alone mail it out.

Have you ever thought you should just send a card to someone as a quick thanks, or to recognize an accomplishment, or just to touch bases? Those are promptings. How often do you act on such promptings?

The solution came to me when I reconnected with an acquaintance of mine who introduced me to Send Out Cards. We often abbreviate that to SOC, and today it occurred to me that SOC could also stand for Save On Cards.

Imagine creating a personalized card, printed with your message on it, stuffed in an envelope for you, having the mailing address and your return address printed on the envelope, having someone else mail it for you with a real stamp on it, and having the recipient receive it . . . in about a week. And imagine if all of that could be done for $2.99 – including the postage!

What could that do for your promptings? How many people could you impact with a positive message?

Now here is the free offer.     

 

I want you to send a card to someone special in your life.

As soon as your read that last sentence, you thought of someone, didn’t you? That’s a prompting. That person needs to hear from you.

And I want you to send the card for free!

Yup, free. Gratis. On me. I want you to see how easy and how much fun it is to send a card for any occasion. Simply go to derekbly.com, click on 2 “Send a Free Card” and discover for yourself how easy it is to send an actual, high quality greeting card to someone special. There is a walk-through video to guide you through the process, but if you like the personal touch, let me know and I’ll be your guide.

So what are you waiting for? Someone out there wants to hear from your. And sending the card is free. Heck, you can even paste a photo inside the card if you want to really personalize it.

Try it now.

Then think what it could mean for your Christmas mailing list if you could create one card that shares your message and have it sent to everyone on that list with a few button clicks!

Go to derekbly.com and touch someone’s life with a card.

2010: Begin Again - The Gathering Part 3

The Gathering III

Introduction: The following is the final of a three-part blog that looks at the dangers fundamentalism poses to the Earth. On Sept. 12, 2010, I was speaking at the Unitarian Universalist Fellowship of Lethbridge. It was the day of our special 'Gathering of the Waters' ceremony. My talk and this blog plays off of the idea of human beings coming together is a similar fashion. I've divided it into three parts for an easier read and enhanced it with visuals not included in the talk. For your review: Part 1 and Part 2.

Warning: If you support fundamentalist religious or political beliefs, you may find parts of this series offensive. Sorry, but it's time we all opened our eyes and minds to what is happening around the Earth. These are merely my thoughts after living a life that has included membership in fundamentalist churches as well as becoming a secular humanist. If this isn't your cup of tea . . . don't drink it!
In the U.S., plans to construct a Muslim community centre that would include a mosque two blocks from ‘Ground Zero’ in New York City are attacked by opponents who claim it is an insult to the victims of 9/11 and that this is sacred ground.

Sacred ground that is currently home to businesses like the Pussycat strip bar, the Thunder Lingerie and peep show shop, 11 bars, 17 pizza places, 18 banks, 10 shoe stores and 17 salons that cater to women who want their lady parts groomed. That’s according to a survey by the New York Daily News.

All the booze, pizza and porn you could want is acceptable, but don’t let the Muslims in!

What’s an insult to the victims of 9/11 is the number of citizens who seem to have forgotten a basic lesson of kindergarten, that two wrongs don’t make a right, and that freedom of religion is what makes our land sacred.

Fear-mongering, scare tactics and, dare I say out and out lies are used to portray opponents as monsters waiting to destroy your way of life. To vote for them is to seal your own doom because only our party knows what’s best for you and the country.

Really? Only one political party has good ideas? Your opponent never has a concept worth considering? Or does the thought of acknowledging a positive suggestion from the opposition wound the ego so deeply you need to resort to the childish antic of name-calling?

“When I became a man, I put away childish things.”

Where are the real leaders today? Where are the people with an actual vision for the future? Being so focused on the power play limits the scope for an inclusive approach for all of our tomorrows. It limits our thinking.

Carl Sagan once noted: “We are like butterflies who flutter for a day and think it’s forever.”

Politics and religion. Religion and politics. The two things we never discuss in polite company. Two things that keep us divided into our separate little tribes. Two of the things that hold us down as a species and keep us from the magnificent raison d'être of being the caretakers this planet needs now for a healthy home tomorrow.

Imagine if we could grow beyond tribalism. Imagine a future that sees humanity united at last for the common good. Imagine a world that embraces Sagan’s philosophy, summed up as:

Every one of us is precious in the cosmic perspective. If a human disagrees with you, let him live. In a hundred billion galaxies, you will not find another.

Today we celebrated a Gathering of the Waters Ceremony – to me that’s symbolic of all coming peacefully together as one and that’s really what this world needs on a grand scale.

Look at it. More than 70% of the Earth’s surface is covered in water. Our own bodies consist of 55-60% water.

Imagine if the human race could come together in a gathering of our waters.

Imagine if for once the common good could wash away the stain of intolerance spread by differences that should be respected. Imagine how that could impact all of our tomorrows.

Maybe that’s overly optimistic. But I leave you with the words of John Lennon that we enjoyed a few moments ago.

Imagine there's no countries                          

It isn't hard to do

Nothing to kill or die for

And no religion too

Imagine all the people

Living life in peace

You may say that I'm a dreamer

But I'm not the only one

I hope someday you'll join us

And the world will be as one

Thank you.

2010: Begin Again - The Gathering Part 2

The Gathering II

Introduction: The following is the second of a three-part blog that looks at the dangers fundamentalism poses to the Earth. On Sept. 12, 2010, I was speaking at the Unitarian Universalist Fellowship of Lethbridge. It was the day of our special 'Gathering of the Waters' ceremony. My talk and this blog plays off of the idea of human beings coming together is a similar fashion. I've divided it into three parts for an easier read and enhanced it with visuals not included in the talk. The final part will follow in the next few days. For your review: Part 1.

Warning: If you support fundamentalist religious or political beliefs, you may find parts of this series offensive. Sorry, but it's time we all opened our eyes and minds to what is happening around the Earth. These are merely my thoughts after living a life that has included membership in fundamentalist churches as well as becoming a secular humanist. If this isn't your cup of tea . . . don't drink it!

September is also the month that sees children back in school full-time. I don’t know about you, but the school playground could be the scene for a lot of animosity when I was a kid. I suspect it was the same everywhere and that likely little has changed since I was young.

Differences of opinion as to who was better would occasionally break down into the “my dad” debate. Maybe you remember it?

“My dad’s got a better car than your dad.”

“My dad’s job is better than your dad’s.”

“My dad’s richer than your dad.”

“My dad’s bigger than our dad.”

And the clincher . . .

“My dad can beat up your dad.”

Such silly, childish arguments should be relegated to our past. They should be. But they’re not. Substitute the word “god” for “dad” and see if the adult world makes any more sense.

“My God is better than your God.”

“My God is always right. Your God is wrong.”

“My God can beat up your God.” . . . and I’m going to prove it!

1 Corinthians 13:11; “When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.”

Ladies and gentlemen, recess is over. It’s time to come in off the playground, put away childish things and do some growing.

I’m not saying people need to give up their spiritual beliefs.

But I think that for the future of this planet and for the generations that follow us, there needs to be a maturing of thought that allows for a fresh perspective and an open mind when it comes to religion and politics.

I believe a closed mind can easily fall back into an egocentric state; one in which people see their beliefs as correct and anyone with a different idea as being wrong. They see themselves in competition with others and since the ego is so vulnerable and sensitive they are compelled towards defensiveness and self-justification.

Their egocentrism manifests as an inability to see other people’s viewpoints. Lao Tzu, a philosopher in ancient China, summed it up nicely. “Without ropes they bind themselves.”

If the beliefs that serve as ropes only bound those so afflicted, perhaps it would be a tragedy only on a small, personal level. But it often seems that those so ensnared want to lasso the rest of society into sharing their same vision . . . or lack of vision as the case were.

We see that demonstrated today in the actions of religious fundamentalists of all stripes. Some seem intent on blowing up themselves and the rest of the world to bring all under the yoke of their concept of a Supreme Being. Others push to have their faith-based views serve as the basis for acceptable societal norms and to ascertain that the God of their holy scriptures is the only God.

To see this here in Lethbridge, just check out the letters to the editor in the Herald.

“My God is right; your God is wrong.”

The dangers inherent in such extremism are testimony to the wisdom of keeping church and state separate.

When a nation becomes a theocracy, the rights of minorities are often obliterated. You can see that today in some nations that are essentially Islamic theocracies. There are also those who’d like to push their nation along the path to a more fundamentalist Christian approach, especially in the U.S. Listen to them and you hear rhetoric that differs little from what’s coming out of Iran.

“My God can beat up your God . . . and I’m going to prove it.”

But the danger of extremism is already a part of the world of politics, isn’t it?

I don’t know about you, but I’m starting to wonder about politics as a way to foster positive change. Democracy is a beautiful concept, but the process seems to be grinding to a halt at provincial or state levels and higher.

Is the party system slipping away from the notion of governing with the best intent of the people in mind? Often it seems what’s best for the party governs decisions.

I hate being cynical, but sometimes I just can’t help it. Once a party is elected to form a government, the mandate no longer seems to focus as much on good governing as it does on keeping the party in power at all costs.

When such extremism comes in through the front door, rational debate is often pitched out the nearest window. Instead of intelligent argument and an exchange of ideas, you see political adversaries vilifying each other.

And you see religion dragged into politics and used as a weapon to bludgeon others for the sake of securing or retaining power, not for the good of a nation.

Next: Politics and religion. Religion and politics. When fundamentalists blend the two, the results can't be good. It's the final part of The Gathering.

2010: Begin Again - The Gathering Part 1

The Gathering

Introduction: The following is part 1 of a three-part blog that looks at the dangers fundamentalism poses to the Earth. On Sept. 12, 2010, I was speaking at the Unitarian Universalist Fellowship of Lethbridge. It was the day of our special 'Gathering of the Waters' ceremony. My talk and this blog plays off of the idea of human beings coming together is a similar fashion. I've divided it into three parts for an easier read and enhanced it with visuals not included in the talk. The next two parts will follow during the coming week.

Warning: If you support fundamentalist religious or political beliefs, you may find parts of this series offensive. Sorry, but it's time we all opened our eyes and minds to what is happening around the Earth. These are merely my thoughts after living a life that has included membership in fundamentalist churches as well as becoming a secular humanist. If this isn't your cup of tea . . . don't drink it!

The Gathering

Imagine if this is it. Imagine if this is the only oasis of life in the cold, black expanse of space.

Yes, yes I know there are plenty of stars in the night sky. Science tells us there are billions of stars in our own galaxy and billions of galaxies in our universe. And perhaps one day we’ll discover our universe is only one of billions in a multiverse.

Now that can make you feel a little insignificant, can’t it?

Carl Sagan, noted astronomer and perhaps best known as host of the old PBS series Cosmos, said “We find that we live on an insignificant planet of a hum-drum star lost in a galaxy tucked away in some forgotten corner of a universe in which there are far more galaxies than people.”

But what if this is it for life?

Currently, we have no proof of life existing anywhere else. Not sentient life. Not advanced life. Not even microorganisms. Many would say that, given the reality of the number of stars in the universe, we can’t be the only planet orbiting one in such a way as to have life develop and evolve on it.

But what if we are? What if we are unique in the universe?

You can forget that feeling of insignificance I mentioned a moment ago, because suddenly each one of us, indeed, every living thing on this plant becomes more precious than the rarest gem imaginable.

Earth, our home, becomes the treasure trove of all life. And our responsibility to look after this jewel escalates beyond all levels of comprehension. We become the caretakers of the one island of life in a celestial ocean that stretches beyond our ability to perceive or even conceive.

Wow! Wouldn’t that be a magnificently noble cause to which all of humanity could aspire? For eons our species has asked why are we here, searched for our purpose and this could be it. But we’re not anywhere near there yet, are we? In fact, I would say we’re a long way from being the caretakers this planet needs.

To save the Earth, we first need to save ourselves. To save ourselves, we first need to become more united. To become more united we need to grow beyond the tribalism we have embraced for thousands of years. And to do that we need to be willing to change.

Today I’m asking you to be open to the idea of change. Some people find that a real challenge.

I do not know every individual here well enough to know your personal beliefs, faith or spiritual preferences. And my intention is not to attack any particular group or tradition. I don’t want to offend, but I hope you won’t mind that I’m going to be a little bit rude from this point on.

You see, it’s often said that in polite company there are two things we do not discuss. And those would be . . . politics and religion.

Ladies and gentlemen, take a look around. Take a good, hard, honest look at the world. The time has come to stop being so polite! Our tribal societies keep us divided and much of our tribalism is dictated by politics and religion.

The Earth is our only home and if we cannot unite in it’s preservation, we will fall victim to our own tribal ideologies. At the time of the American Civil War, Abraham Lincoln noted: “A house divided against itself cannot stand.” This is our house and if we cannot stand united, we will fall divided.

Nine years ago this month, we witnessed an extreme example of the effect of living in insular tribes. Do you remember where you were on on Sept. 11, 2001?

On that day, members of one tribe, guided by the ravings of someone with influence in their lives, turned four passenger jets into weapons of mass destruction, smashing into the twin towers of the world trade centre, the Pentagon and into a field in Pennsylvania.

Certainly, this is an exceptional case. It’s easy to point fingers at the perpetrators of these acts of terrorism, to despise them and to hold everyone who follows their faith to blame. But doing that means we need to turn a mirror on our own tribes and reflect on our history. Horrific atrocities have been committed to spread beliefs that many in our society hold dear.

No group can claim its hands are clean. We could wonder around like latter-day Lady Macbeth’s, wringing our hands and crying “Out, damned spot, out I say” in anguish over the blood shed for many pointless reasons.

Or we could take a different, more productive path. One of change.

Next: Part 2 of The Gathering looks at the need for humanity to grow up and leave our childish ways behind if we are to every become the caretakers of this planet Earth.

2010: Begin Again - Self Trust and Personal Success

Go for the Gold

Thar’s gold in them thar hills! At least there was back in 1854 in a territory that soon after became the state of Colorado. Stories abound of men who struck it rich and of the many more men who toiled away and earned very little . . . or nothing. Perhaps the best lesson to come out of the gold rush was shared by Napoleon Hill in the classic book Think and Grow Rich.

At the time, R. U. Darby, who lived in Maryland, was contacted by an uncle who’d struck gold in Colorado. The uncle needed financial support to buy equipment necessary to process the vein. With the support of friends and a few neighbours, the money was raised, the equipment purchased and Darby accompanied his uncle out west to work the claim.

The quality of the ore proved top-rate and the men went to town drilling away to dig up the gold. Just when things were looking great, the vein of gold disappeared. The men drilled on to no avail. Finally, giving up the hunt, they took their loses, sold the equipment to a junk man and returned home to the east.

The junkman hired a mining engineer to look at the site. The engineer determined the original owners didn’t know enough about fault lines to realize they needed to shift their operation. Three feet over, the junkman found the main vein and went on to extract millions of dollars worth of gold. And this was in the 1850s when a million really meant something

Three Feet From Gold

Greg Reid and Sharon Lechter recall this story in their book Three Feet from Gold. Consider the book a follow up to Hill’s Think and Grow Rich, supported by The Napoleon Hill Foundation

The lesson commonly taught from this story is that we should never give up on a goal. Persistence can be the key to eventual success.

Yeah, that’s good. And I agree with it. But I think there is more here than learning of the need to stick to it. In fact, the lessons in Three Feet from Gold tie right back to my previous blogs on the Speed of Trust and Developing Self Trust. And that’s what has me excited right now.

When I see a convergence of ideas that build on and support each other, I think I’ve learned a real lesson. That’s what I’m taking away from my experience with The Speed of Trust presentation by Stephen M.R. Covey at Lethbridge College; exercises and teachings in The Quest: A Journey of Spiritual Rediscovery; and the wonderful stories in Three Feet from Gold.

The Reid and Lechter book shares the stories of real men and women who faced huge obstacles with grit and determination and pushed through them to find incredible success on the other side. People from the worlds of business, philanthropy, sports and publishing. People like James Amos, former chair and CEO of Mail Boxes Etc.; Genevieve Bos, who started Pink Magazine for professional women; Truett Cathy, founder of Chick-fil-A Inc.; Debbi Fields, of Mrs. Fields Cookies fame; Mark Victor Hansen; Evander Holyfield; and more.

Some names you’d recognize, some you would not. But in most cases you’d be familiar with the outcomes of their tales. Yes, they showed determination, but they also showed a huge degree of self trust.

Each goal they achieved along the way placed another stone of proof in their walls of self trust. They developed a deep-seated belief in who they were, what they were doing and in the knowledge that they could trust themselves to do what was needed.

Catch the Wave

Remember, self trust is the first point in Covey’s Five Waves of Trust. With that firmly in place, the ripples could flow out through the other four waves, Relationship Trust, Organizational Trust, Market Trust and Societal Trust. And those are waves you can ride to whatever success you seek. But it all starts with Self Trust.

Do you really, deep down inside, trust yourself? That trust is the key to your own success. Think about it. If that first wave rolls out to the second, Relationship Trust, you begin to enhance the base from which you can build. With a growing Relationship Trust, you start to see people in your life who can help you move forward.

What if R. U. Darby’s trust had extended out beyond his uncle and family members? Perhaps a stronger Relationship Trust could have led to contact with someone wise enough to help him understand gold mining a bit better and that massive vein could have been found by Darby instead of the junk dealer.

In my life I’m finally, at 53, beginning to develop the self trust that will take me from here to there . . . wherever I decide there to be. Developing it requires taking some baby steps to achieve small goals that confirm within my own consciousness that I can trust myself to get it done.

It also requires, as pointed out in Adventures on the Quest, an awareness of what I’m feeding the brain and a willingness to critically examine what’s going into it. Is it my truth or what someone else wants me to believe?

GIGO

Our perception of the world can be skewed to the negative by what we read and see. We can allow ourselves to absorb the world’s sewage or we can filter out what doesn’t truly feed us. My wife rarely reads or watches the news. Why? Too depressing!

Think about what gets media attention. Do you see a lot of good news and uplifting stories? As I write this blog entry, I’ve quickly skipped over to Yahoo.ca to see the current headlines. Here they are in the exact order as of this moment:

• Toronto high school locked down after shots fired inside
• Gay student secretly taped having sex kills self in N.J.
• T.O. MD faces 26 new charges of molesting sleeping patients
• Father weeps as he admits shooting infant son with shotgun
• Shootout on Toronto streets leaves two people dead
• '100 per cent' sure life exists on new planet: Astronomer
• Virgin offering deep discounts on flights to Toronto
• Stand-up comedian Greg Giraldo dies of overdose at 44
• Several bright UFOs sighted in skies over Montreal
• Paris Hilton and new beau in car accident in Hollywood

That’s 10 headlines. Read the first five again. How does it make you feel? Life seems cheapened, doesn’t it? Death. Suicide. Abuse. Murder. But the sixth headline offers hope: there’s somewhere else that might have life. Maybe we could move there, if Virgin’s deep discounts on flights would include the long haul through space. Of course, the UFOs over Montreal may provide a better deal if they have a seat sale!

GIGO – garbage in, garbage out. If this is all we feed our brains, can you see how our perception of the world could start to become excessively negative? Self trust requires proper care to bloom and grow. This type of raw sewage carries little of nutritional value. Be sure to use a good filtration system when allowing the world to enter.

Consider what is influencing you’re thinking. Through self examination it’s possible to begin enhancing self trust, allowing an individual to see that aspirations may truly be attainable after all. Perhaps the trust waves can carry us further and we won’t stop three feet from gold.

Personal Success Equation

It’s time to wrap up this three-part series on the converging elements that have impacted me during the last two weeks. About a week ago I posted the following on Facebook; Lesson for today: ((P+T) x A x A) + F = ??????

It puzzled some people. It helps summarize my thoughts on the whole self trust and success concept. I promised a solution and here it is from Three Feet From Gold.

((P+T) x A x A) + F = Your Success Equation

((Passion + Talent) x Association x Action) + Faith = Your Success Equation.

Passion and talent are fed by self trust. Multiple this by Association, which comes from the second wave – Relationship Trust – and Action, which also originates with self trust and is influenced by the resulting trust waves. Finally, add Faith. If you trust yourself and you trust individuals and organizations with which you associate, you can have the faith to forge ahead

Believe it and achieve it, my friends!

Next in 2010: Begin Again – On Sept. 12, I spoke at the Unitarian Universalist Fellowship in Lethbridge. My talk was called The Gathering. It’s a call for a more open-minded approach to life, one that moves away from fundamentalism of all stripes, in order to save this planet. Warning: If you are a fundamentalist who believes your way is the only way, you may not like the next posting!