In Memory of George Harper

Feelings of melancholy and contentment mix together as I contemplate George Harper’s transition from the earth-bound to the spiritual realm.

Melancholy because those of us left behind will miss his presence in our lives. Contentment because I believe what we perceive as death liberates spirit to return to original source – that which we often call God.

George, my father-in-law, passed away during the early evening of Monday, March 15, surrounded by family members. He had been battling cancer for the past year, finally succumbing to the wear and tear on his body in his final few days with us.

It is not the final few days I will remember. It is all of the years that came before.

I met George Harper when I was a scrawny 18-year-old in hot pursuit of his 16-year-old daughter, Lynda. Back then, the Harper clan was living in a smallish house on 19th Street North here in Lethbridge. I think the first time I saw him, he was in jeans and a white T-shirt and he was working on his big, old brown Ford LTD.

He reminded me of some guy from out of a movie set in the 1950s.

I, of course, thought he was an old man – the father of the girl I was interested in. Looking back it’s a little disconcerting to realize he was younger then than I am now. And not by just a couple of years. He was about a decade younger than my current age.

George was military through and through. He believed in discipline in the family and rules for acceptable behaviour in his house. And his children are all better off for that.

Yes, there was no doubt as to who was the boss of the Harper household. That would be Sharon, of course, but she graciously allowed George to feel like he was in control.

It may seem incongruent, but the man who could seem so stern at times was also like a little boy who enjoyed a good joke, or even a bad one, and trust me, George told some real stinkers in his time. He re-introduced me to the ‘wet-willy’ – not exactly an endearing experience, but he got a chuckle out of it.

He passed this somewhat juvenile prank along to his daughter, Lynda, who now regularly torments Walter Wilson with it at the Legion.

I suspect George’s love of pranks stayed with him to the end. Sharon’s sister, Joyce, and her husband, also a George, came from Castlegar, B.C. to visit at the palliative care unit on what was to be George Harper’s last weekend in this physical existence.

With little obvious change in his condition by Monday morning, they thought it best to head home to Castlegar. But I believe George was really setting up for one last prank on his sister-in-law. No sooner would they have reached home, and George’s spirit thought ‘ha, got you, again,’ and he made his final exit forcing Joyce and George to repack and prepare to head back in the direction from which they’d just come.

Joyce, I hope you will consider it George Harper’s parting gift to you – sort of a ‘wet-willy’ from beyond.

Having met George when I did, I was privileged to know him for close to half of his life. And I know him as a self-made man. That’s a term we often use when referring to someone who has acquired a lot of money and build a considerable estate. But it is also a term that definitely applies to the man we remember today.

George lived life on his own terms. Make no mistake about it.
Perhaps he was not what many would consider wealthy in material ways, but he certainly was in the things that really count in life.

Through his military career George served our nation with honour and with pride. Long before Canada had troops in Afghanistan or Bosnia, we had peacekeepers in Cyprus serving to keep animosities between Greek and Turkish residents in check. George was among the Canadians who helped keep the peace.

After retiring from the military, his support for our troops never waivered. He was steadfast in his commitment to the Royal Canadian Legion in general and to the local General Stewart Branch #4 in particular, and I know he is privileged to have Gabriel’s Angels and representatives of the Ladies’ Auxiliary here today.

Coming from a military family myself, I can deeply appreciate his years of service. Few non-military people can truly understand the dedication it takes to commit to that career.

New postings would always create upheaval in the family with lots of packing, unpacking, saying goodbye to friends and having to make new ones. And there could be lots of time spent apart from loved ones during military exercises and on special tours of duty.

It takes an exceptional wife and family to support such a life and I know George counted his family as his real riches. My mother-in-law Sharon and her children Lynda, Diana, Brenda and David are his greatest treasures. I’m blessed to count them as my family and George as my father-in-law.

I cannot say rest in peace, George, for I know you have only left the here-and-now to begin a new adventure on another plane of existence. Until we do meet again, I can say blessings and godspeed. We will all catch up to you some day and once again savour our time together.